Mine

Mine
A riding crop and a blindfold doesn't make it BDSM. There is a big difference between being kinky and being in the scene. It's not a sexual thing to me, it's a very spiritual thing. ~ DominaBlue

8/22/11

Chapter 73

BPOV

“Me?”

What the heck is Emmett talking about? He’s the one who said nooky. The day before when Edward was fooling around with his head inside shirt making me squirm from his nibbling on my ribs. Emmett caught us, announcing, ‘No nooky on the beach,’ Vinny echoed it and we all laughed knowing that the little parrot would repeat it.

Oh my god

Freaking Emmett, he said he was going to blame me. I wasn’t going to let him get away with that, “I did not…”

Emmett interrupted my declaration of innocence, “Don’t worry about it Bella, we all know how things slip out.”

I sat there with my mouth gaping open as Vinny tried to come to my defense. Shaking his head he continued looking at Emmett, “But Aunt Bella did…”

Emmett stopped him from finishing also, “We know aunt Bella didn’t mean it…” he was imploring the child to go along with his bullshit. Vinny narrowed his eyes and was going to say something but Emmett continued, “Just so you know little man that is not a nice word to say, and Aunt Bella should know better.”

Rose was snickering in the chair next to me while Edward – the traitor – chuckled under his breath. I figured I was on my own with this one, that was ok I could fight my own battles.

Everyone was staring at me – albeit with a smile on their faces; however that could have been from the two year old sitting on my lap dripping blue freeze pop all over my legs. Looking to Alice something she said came to mind, “Whatever happened to ‘he who names takes the blame?’”

Emmett tisked a few times before shaking his head in disapproval, “You shouldn’t try to pass off your mistakes with a childhood misnomer.”

Oh…the shit was getting deep

My protector finally did something to let me know that he was coming to my rescue. Giving me a sly smile Edward winked at me before turning to his brother, “I don’t know if that is such a good idea Emmett.”

“What?”

At Emmett’s question Edward pursed his lips shaking his head a cynical manner, “All I know is I wouldn’t do anything to aggravate the person who holds the tickets.”

My eyes narrowed as I wasn’t sure what he was talking about, it was apparent neither did Emmett, “What tickets?”

Emmett’s eyes shot to me scrutinizing me sitting there holding Mia, “What does she have some kind season tickets to the college psychology symposiums? Because I’m really not interested in hearing any Freudian theories, I got all the phallic envy I need,” his hand moved cupping his junk while everyone except Esme groaned.

She narrowed her eyes at her oldest son giving him a stern reproof, “Don’t be crass.”

Edward sighed heavily, “You’ll be singing a new tune the first Sunday you’re at home and spot us all on the big screen during the Seahawks game.”

That got Emmett’s attention as he eyed me suspiciously while Edward added “But I guess that’s your prerogative”

“Seahawks?” Jasper question looking to me, “Bella you have tickets?”

“Umm…” I wasn’t sure how to respond because the tickets were in my possession but they were Edward’s.

“She sure does,” Edward answered for me with a smug smile, “and I would venture to guess that it’s going to take a whole lot of groveling and sucking up before she lets you use them,” at the last part his attention was focused on his brother who was gaping at me with an open mouth.

“Wait…wait one minute. How much groveling are we talking about?” Wanting clarification Jasper rested his elbows on his knees as he leaned forward while he questioned Edward on the specifics. “I mean are we talking first level down on your knees begging or third level nose bleed ‘I’m sorry’s’ but please let me go to the game bowing?”

Carlisle tilted his head giving me a small smile, “How many games do you have tickets for Bella?”

Again I didn’t get to answer as Edward’s smile turned devious while he raised one eyebrow at his father, “All the games.” The other two men gasped-well Jasper gasped Emmett kind of whimpered. “Now I’ll leave it up to you dad, how much groveling do four season tickets in the VIP Booth deserve?”

“No fucking way!” Emmett jumped to his feet almost knocking little Vinny over as Esme and Alice both reprimanded him for cursing. He didn’t even hear them as he turned to stare down at me in disbelief, “You have…four tickets…in the VIP Booths?”

He was looking at me like I was a hot fudge sundae, with large wide eyes and (I think) drool was dripping down his chin. I was getting kind of nervous because I wasn’t sure what he was going to do to get his hands on those tickets so I was glad when Edward spoke taking Emmett’s attention away from me, “She does, I’ve seen them along with a VIP parking pass.”

Emmett swallowed hard while Edward questioned, “So dad, what kind of groveling do you think that deserves?”

Carlisle didn’t get to answer as Jasper spoke up, “I think that’s down on your knees, feet kissing while pleading undying devotion.”

Everyone else laughed as Emmett dropped to his knees, my first reaction was to pull my legs up with a stern warning, “Don’t you touch my feet.”

“Bella, sweet little Bella, so kind and wonderful, I swear…” bringing his hand over his heart, “I will never, ever again blame you for something I did…” twisting his upper body Emmett faced all the others, “…it was me, I said nooky.”

“And the red underwear comment?” Edward questioned as Emmett looked a little worried when Rose wondered, “What underwear comment?”

“It was a simple observation babe, Bella came out in teal cheekies and I said red would look better on her.” Turning back to me his face became apologetic, “But I shouldn’t have said that, because any color would look good on you.”

I couldn’t stop the giggle, “That’s not the point, you shouldn’t have said anything about my panties.”

“Well what was I supposed to do when you come traipsing out in front of us? I’m telling you girl you’re lucky they…” he thumbed over his shoulder, “…are doctors, or they would have said something too.”

“Why were you in your underwear?” Before the whole thing could get out of hand Edward clued Alice in on what happened. Throughout his re-telling I could hear Carlisle and Jasper pleading their virtuousness by saying that they had indeed turned their heads. Emmett however made no such claim as he continued to give me puppy dog eyes until he finally laid his head down on my knee, “Please Bella, forgive me, I knew not what I was doing.”

I pushed his head away with a giggle, “Get off me. Besides they’re not my tickets.”

That piece of information got his attention as his head shot up and he asked, “Who’s are they?” at the same time Edward questioned, “What do you mean?” and Jasper asked with a clear tone of disappointment, “You don’t have tickets?”

Three grown men were staring at me like little boys waiting for their mother to tell them their room was clean enough for them to go outside and play. Pulling Mia a little closer to my body I was hoping that the small sticky child might provide me some protection, because they wanted an answer. I decided to work my way backwards starting with Jasper, “Yes, I have the tickets,” as he relaxed I turned to Edward. “But they are not mine,” lastly I answered the man who was still kneeling on the floor in front of me. “They’re Edward’s.”

“Mine?”

Who did he think I got them for?

“Yeah…I wanted to give them to you for your Birthday, but since you were standing right there…”

“My birthday?” he sounded shocked.

Wasn’t it customary to get your boyfriend a birthday present?

“Did you change your mind? Don’t you want them?” At my questions Edward remained quiet while he just stared at me. So much time had passed that I was beginning to worry that I had done the wrong thing.

He didn’t want them

I wasn’t the only one who mistook the meaning of his quietness, Emmett glanced back at me, “If he doesn’t want them, can I have them?”

That seemed to bring Edward back to the land of the living, his voice was firm as he spoke to his brother, “No, you can’t have them,” as his gaze came back to me his features softened along with his tone. “I want them, it’s just…”

I let out a silent sigh of relief, it’s not like the tickets had cost me a lot of money it was more of the fact that I had asked Emery to do me a favor.

“Honey that’s…my god baby that’s…”Edward couldn’t seem to get the words out, “Bella those tickets are worth six hundred dollars…”

“A piece?”

Three voices answered in unison, “A game!” Carlisle was the one who completely enlightened me. “Each ticket, for each game is worth that much.”

I was stunned that tickets to a football game could cost so much. Edward seemed a little stunned himself. “You bought me something like fifteen thousand dollars worth of tickets…” he sounded astonished as he went on, “… and that’s not counting pre-season, UW college games, or possible post-season playoffs.”

“You paid all that money for football, and turned down Gucci because it was too expensive?” Shifting my gaze to Alice I defended myself, “I didn’t pay that much.”

“How much were they?”

“Edward you don’t ask how much a gift was?” Esme tried to give her a son an etiquette lesson, but it didn’t matter because I could tell by the look on his face he really wanted to know.

“Only a few hundred dollars processing fee.”

“How well do you know Sterla?” the tone in Emmett’s voice indicating something torrid had occurred.

I had no intention of answering such a preposterous accusation. The only person who had any right to that information was Edward and he already knew all about the relationship that I shared with the guys from the reservation.

Giving me a thoughtful expression Edward answered his brother, “He calls her sweet cheeks”

“Ohhhh…” Emmett groaned while from the corner of my eye I could see Jasper sit back in his chair and Rose snickered as her husband wondered, “I guess walking around in your underwear is an old habit, huh?”

Edward continued to hold my gaze as he declared, “Actually, she wasn’t wearing underwear.”

For a few seconds I forgot that everyone else was around us as I got lost in the perfection that is Edward’s face. I love when he takes on the dark no nonsense sternness of my Master. The look that leaves me no doubt who is in charge and makes my body quiver with anticipation. Next on my list of favorites is the look carefree playfulness that is like a contagious disease causing me to smile like a fool right along with him.

Yes, perfection

Breaking the trance I was in Edward asked humbly, “Those tickets are mine?”

I shrugged, “Happy Birthday.”

Edward leaned over to give me a quick kiss whispering a thank you as his mom let out an, “Awe” and Alice declared that he better remember that when it came time for my birthday, making me roll my eyes at her. The last thing I wanted Edward to do was spend a lot of money on me for gifts. I wasn’t lying when I told Emmett that it didn’t matter if the toe rings were cheap. I wasn’t accustomed to people buying me gifts and I certainly didn’t expect anything. I was more than happy with the simple gesture that told me while we were apart he had thought about me. That was worth more than anything else he could ever give me.

Emmett having decided that since I no longer had the leverage of the tickets to hold over him, he could get off his knees. He also announced that all bets were off making me fair game for as he said, ‘sibling rivalry.’ It didn’t matter to me because in all honesty I didn’t expect him to behave himself anyway, in fact I would have been rather disappointed if he had. Because even though I defended myself – as anyone would –the fact that he had felt comfortable enough to include me in the family repartee was rather heartwarming. The spirited action spoke volumes at his and everyone else’s acceptance of me. I was beginning to feel like I was truly a part of the family rather than being an interloper along for the ride.

Vinny went back into the pool; Mia had made herself and me a sticky mess so while Alice watched Vinny swimming I went with Rose and Esme into the bathroom to wash us off. While the two of them went into the stalls I set Mia down on the sink with her little feet inside the bowl. Turning on the water I turned to get some paper towels laughing as she splashed water all over the place with her feet. I had just finished washing her off and started on my legs when the girl who had followed Edward out of the bathroom earlier came in.

Ignoring her as she stood next to us washing her hands my attention was on Mia, turning off the water I worked on drying off her legs and feet. The girl was following my actions in the mirror and I wanted to ask her if she had something to say but I didn’t get a chance to as she turned to face me.

“He said he would meet me later.”

“Excuse me?” I asked looking around me to make sure that she was talking to me.

“Edward’s exact words were ‘once I can get away from the clingy bitch’ he would meet me down in the bar for a drink. You know if you’re so worried about him cheating that you can’t let him out of your sight I guess your relationship can’t be all that stable.”

I knew what she was saying was a lie, Edward would never say that about me. I also was smart enough to recognize a poor imitation of reverse psychology. She was hoping that either her first statement would cause a fight or in my attempt to not be overbearing, I would practically kick Edward out the door to go have ‘fun’ without me. Both of those scenarios would send Edward out where she would be waiting to try and get her clutches into him. I knew all that and yet I couldn’t stop the sick feeling in my stomach from occurring as I heard first one then the other toilet flush. Rose and Esme came out at the same time but it was Esme who spoke, “Bella take my grand-daughter out of here.”

One look at her face told me not to defy her; Rose quickly washed her hands following me out of the bathroom. We didn’t say anything until we got over to the pool where Alice had a little floating seat for Mia to sit in. Looking over our shoulders she wondered, “Where’s mom?”

“Momma bear is protecting her cubs,” Rose said while we walked down the stairs into the water. Alice narrowed her eyes but Rose glanced over at the guys sitting on the ledge with their feet in the water and whispered, “I’ll tell you later.”

Putting Mia in her seat the three of us pushed her back and forth in the water smiling at the glee in her laughter while I watched for Esme to come back. After a few minutes – that felt like an eternity – Rose nodded her chin murmuring, “skank on the run.”

The girl did not look happy at all as she went over to her friend, gathered her stuff together and left without even looking in our direction. I stood there staring while Rose laughed under her breath, “you got to love Esme.”

“What do you think she said to her?” I wondered while Alice seemed like she was going to burst as she came closer to us whispering, “What happened?”

We didn’t get to answer as Esme appeared at the pool, joining us she glanced over to see ‘skank two’ gathering her things to leave. Esme got a wicked grin on her face that reminded me of the one Edward sometimes gets. She gave me a warm smile while Rose asked, “What did you say to her?”

“I reminded her that there are two types of women in the world, those with dignity and decorum and those with vulgar immorality, and I assured her that she was of the second kind.”

At my giggle Alice was practically seething as her voice grew slightly above a whisper, “Would somebody please tell me what I missed?”

“Later,” Rose whispered again making Alice sigh in frustration.

My attention went to Esme, “I could have taken care of that.”

She smiled sadly, “I know you could have, but it was better and less dramatic coming from me. Besides I’ve had more practice dealing with …skanks,” she smiled while we giggled at her use of word, “lots of women have thought they could get their hooks into my husband and I had to assure them that they could not.”

“I can see that, Carlisle is really handsome,” Rose said.

Looking over at the man in question, I had to agree with her but didn’t say anything as Esme spoke her words of wisdom. “Yes he is, but men are simple creatures,” she said pushing Mia over to Alice, “that require very little work on our part to keep happy. It boils down to three simple needs.”

I was thinking love, trust and honesty those would be the three main things that any man would need. But I was about to hear words of wisdom from a woman who had been happily married longer than I had been alive proving that I was very wrong.

“There are exceptions, and for whatever reason some men can not commit to one woman, but for the most part the rule holds true. As long as they have clean clothes, hot food and a responsive body in their bed, they are happy. And once they always have those three things they will give their undying devotion to the woman who provides them with it.”

Yeah I was way wrong

“So you and Carlisle still?” I wasn’t going to ask but I was glad Rose did.

“Daily.”

“Ewww…I don’t want to know that,” Alice groaned while Rose and I giggled at the self-confident expression on Esme’s face. I also had to admit that I couldn’t blame her and I stood there in the water hoping in thirty years Edward and I would be the same way.

“See Bella? I told you we all like to be ravished,” Esme assured me then added conspiratorially, “and they need to ravish us.”

As Esme gave her last bit of advice Alice yelled, “Ok that’s it! Vincent it’s time to go get out! We have to ready for dinner.”

Glancing over at the clock I realized it was almost five-thirty, giving us an hour to get ready. Vinny made it clear that he wasn’t happy about having to get out but his mother wasn’t giving a choice. Jasper helped him out of the deep end wrapping a towel around his shoulders with a stern warning about his whining. Mia wasn’t any happier about having to get out of the water, crying as Alice removed her from the floater which Esme carried out of the water. Rose and I stood there listening to the two unhappy children and watching Alice struggle with a squirming child as she tried to remove her wet swimming diaper as inconspicuously as possible.

“Oh Jeez…I don’t know if I’m ready for that.” I giggled at Rose’s bleak expression as her hand cradled over her growing belly.

“You’ll be fine and even the crying will be worth it once little Roscoe comes”

“His name is not Roscoe,” Emmett called from behind me, “his name is Osborn.”

“Like Ozzy?” I asked glancing over my shoulder at Emmett and noticing Edward coming back over with two towels.

I guess it’s time to get out

“No…well yeah but that’s not why,” he tried to explain but Rose cut him off. “Emmett I am not naming my son Osborn so that he can grow up saying, “Oz-born on Tuesday, Oz-born of my mother, Oz-born in October.” Laughing at Rose I moved to get out of the pool, taking Edward’s hand and thanking him for the towel as he handed Rose the other one.

Emmett took the towel from Rose draping it over her shoulders, “Yeah about that babe – since thanks to Bella for Edward’s fuck awesome gift - there are football tickets involved, do you think maybe you could hold the little guy in until after the season?”

“What!” Rose spun around with a wicked glare as Edward and I laughed and Emmett tried to redeem himself, “No go?”

I knew he was kidding, Rose however was another story, “You listen to me Emmett Cullen, I am carrying your child at the expense of stretch marks, saggy boobs and not being able to hold my urine. I don’t care if it was the Super Bowl; your son is due October twenty-eighth. You. Will. Be. There.” saying each word through clenched lips before giving her final answer, “And if you think for one minute that you are going to be leaving me at home every Sunday with a newborn while you go off to a game, you better guess again. So I suggest that you get it all out of your system before then because, come the end of October you’re staying home with me and Roscoe.”

Rose stomped off leaving me standing there snickering along with Edward and I was surprised that Emmett chuckled along with us. “Told ya…hormones.”

Edward shook his head as he laughed, “You better watch it, she’s going to kick your ass.”

“Nah…she’s just all riled up. It makes for some good angry sex,” he smirked at us before going over to Rose who was gathering up their stuff.

Shaking my head of the images that had filtered through I looked up at Edward, “First your mom and now your brother.”

“What about my mom?” He questioned as we walked over to where everyone was getting packed up for the day.

“I’ll tell you later,” I whispered under my breath which for once seemed to satisfy him.

All of our stuff was still in the bag all I had to do was pull the white cover-up over my head, put on my flip flops and grab the towels. Edward put his T-shirt back on before picking up the tote bag and slinging it over his shoulder. Taking one last look around to make sure that nothing had been left behind we walked with everyone out to the elevators.

Rose still had a slight scowl on her face which in my estimation was making Emmett rather happy. We all squeezed into the same elevator talking about what time to meet back down in the lobby. Esme was adamant about leaving by six-thirty and as the ding sounded for our floor Rose smiled at her. “We’ll be there, because I don’t want to be on the receiving end of the momma bear.”

I giggled as Esme rolled her eyes and Alice once again wanted to know what happened in the bathroom. As we stepped off Carlisle was asking what Rose meant and as the doors closed we walked down the hallway to our rooms Rose giggled, “I wish I could have been a fly on the wall in that bathroom.”

“Why didn’t you stay?”

“Because Esme had that look like she was about to devour someone, so I got the hell out of there.”

Leaving them at their door we continued to our room. I hadn’t really had a chance to think about what Esme had done. Throughout all the years of growing up, the only person who I really had for any kind of protection was Charlie. After my mother died I always felt like the only reason he had me living with him was because he had no other choice. For that reason I had put up walls around myself not allowing him to be the defender that a father should have been. Never once did I ask for any comfort from him or allow myself to cry in front of him because I didn’t want Charlie to think that he had inherited a sniveling girl. In my young mind I took it upon myself to take on the attitude of ‘it’s me against the world’ and I was determined to keep it that way.

When I first came to Charlie I believe that he backed off with the idea that he should give me space to adjust. My mother had just died; I was taken away from the only stable family and home that I had known. Everything was different, the weather, friends, school, right down to the food we ate. I had been used to moms erratic cooking; throwing together what she called a ‘concoction.’ In reality it was some sort of casserole made from the leftovers in the fridge with melted cheese on top. Most of the time it turned out well and when it didn’t she would douse it with ketchup, so it would at least be edible.

For the most part Charlie lived on fish, something that up until moving to Washington, I had never eaten. He had no idea how to make a meatloaf or baked macaroni and cheese, all those comfort foods were lost along with my mother. Rather than complain I ate what was in front of me, bidding my time until I was old enough to take over cooking. Even then, at first Charlie doubted my ability but I was determined to show him that I was responsible enough to take on the duty, insisting that I was fully capable of doing it on my own. That assertiveness carried over into my adulthood to the point where even in my darkest hours I refused to allow Charlie the opportunity to help. Not wanting to be a liability, whenever Charlie would ask my standard answer was always, ‘I can handle it.’

Esme didn’t give me the chance to shut her down. She didn’t even ask or think twice about coming to my rescue and as Rose had said she was like a momma bear. Normally having someone else fight my battles would have made me feel weak but somehow it was different. There was no feeling of helplessness or inadequacy; in fact I would say that it was the opposite.

If I had to place a name on how I felt it would have been – Relief.

Relief that I was significant enough to someone that they would take up my cause and not feel like it was burden to do so. In fact it appeared to me, that Esme had gotten her own satisfaction out of what she did. She acted out if instinct to ‘protect her cub’ from the predator who was threating harm. For a moment I walked a little lighter at the thought of being her cub, and then I wondered how Charlie felt at being denied that opportunity.

My mind thought back to the other day when Edward and I left Forks. Sue had said that by my keeping things from Charlie, I was being selfish. I had always thought that my evasiveness of the events was in a sense being the momma bear and protecting my dad from all the horrible details. But I was beginning to wonder if I had a right to do that. Was I being fair to Charlie by denying him the opportunity of the satisfaction he would get from being a father who safeguarded his only child?

Edward’s voice broke through my thoughts, “Baby are you going to tell me what happened? Because this quiet is driving me insane.”

“What?” I had been so lost in my own mind that I was going on auto pilot, not even realizing that we were in our room.

“Sorry. I was just thinking about your mom and…Charlie.”

Edward stood there waiting for me to elaborate but I wasn’t completely sure what to say because I still hadn’t come to my own conclusions. Glancing over at the clock on the microwave I realized that we didn’t have much time. “We have to get ready.”

His eyes narrowed yet he didn’t say anything as he followed me into the bedroom, stopping short at seeing the bed with the evidence of my shopping trip. Not wanting to deal with all the bags I stepped out of my flip flops before going into the bathroom to start the water in the shower. When I turned around a shirtless Edward was standing right behind me making me jump.

“Are you alright?” I couldn’t tell if the question came from concern or amusement

“I’m fine,” I answered with a sigh, and then watched as his brow crinkled while he took a step towards me. Out of instinct my feet retreated in the other direction and a few steps more I could feel the coldness of the marble wall against my back as the warm water cascaded over top of me.

Two arms reached out, planting themselves against the wall on either side of my head imprisoning me, while dark green eyes bore into mine. Edward inclined his shoulders bringing his face to within inches of my own as he spoke with sternness. “What happened in the bathroom?”

It wasn’t a request for information, it was a mandate that he expected to be obeyed. At my sigh, fury rolled across his face and for the first time since I been with Edward, a small twinge of dread ran through me. I figured that even though I hadn’t sufficiently evaluated my thoughts I had better at least give him some kind of an answer.

“Ummm…well, your friend from the beach came in,” Edward’s head tilted minutely as he eyed me suspiciously, “and she said some things…and your…”

My explanation was cut off by his question, “What did she say?”

Shifting my eyes I tried to look over at the faucets to see if I could reach them to shut off the water, “What did she say Bella?”

He was getting angry because I was being so elusive and really I don’t know why I just didn’t come out and tell him the truth. It’s not like I believed what the ‘skank’ said, because I didn’t. Yet I couldn’t stop the insecurities from coming through and I wasn’t sure if it was just me or if every woman who is faced with the same situation would question the hold she has on her man.

“Umm…” taking a deep breath I just spit it out. “Basically a bunch of shit about the two of you talking and that the two of you had made plans to meet later.”

His eyes widened in shock, “And you believed her?”

“No…I knew she was lying, attempting to cause trouble…”

He tilted his head even further bringing his lips closer to mine, “How did you know she was lying?”

My hands came up to lie against the broadness of his chest, “Because you love me and I trust you and…”

At my hasty stop Edward asked, “and?”

“And if you have enough energy to meet another women, you let me know, I’ll be more than happy to help exhaust you.”

“Is that right?” he asked while tugging on the tie at the back of my neck.

“Ah, huh.”

Closing my eyes my head leaned back as I savored the feel of his lips on my neck. Edward’s nose skimmed across my collar bone while his hand opened the other tie in the middle of my back as he spoke softly against my skin, “And what did my mother say to her?”

Swallowing hard I answered through my own hushed voice, “I don’t know, she sent us out.”

“Hmmm,” his lips moved up the other side of my neck sending shivers through my body.

My eyes fluttered open to take in the gorgeous half naked man standing before me. His wet hair, slick body and dark eyes were enhanced by the musky smell coming off his moist skin. It was too much to ignore and I threw my arms around his neck crushing my chest against his as our lips met in a searing kiss.

Our mouths tangled together while I kept my hold around his neck and Edward’s hands slid down my back to cup my bottom. He pulled me closer to him while I wrapped my leg around his upper thigh as he pressed the evidence of his desire for me into my center. Shifting my weight the warm hardness of his dick gave me the most delicious friction and the tingles were like shock waves running through me.

I knew we didn’t have much time and the last thing I wanted to do was be late but the fire was building inside me and I wanted him. Edward must have felt the same way because as quickly as my hands were moving down his body to the waist band of his pants, his fingers were moving the material from the crotch of my swimming suit bottoms out of the way.

It barely registered in my mind that his lips had left mine until I felt his hips shift as he slid the fullness of his length into me. A low needy moan left my mouth and the water splashed in my face as my head rolled back against the wall while his lips once again attacked my neck.

It was tantalizing

It was superb

It was ecstasy

“God, I fucking love you,” Edward spoke with a husky voice against my ear.

I couldn’t think enough to form a coherent thought all I could do was grip his butt with one hand and his shoulder with the other. It was a feeble attempt to hold on to him while he moved with precision in and out of my body. I don’t know if it was the way Edward had me pinned against the wall in an unmovable position or if it was the angle of his trust, either way it didn’t matter, each time he moved shockwaves of pleasure radiated through me. My breathing was heavy and I must have been saying something but the only thing I could concentrate on was the building pressure and one thought filled my mind - more.

Edward’s hand gripped down under my thigh lifting it slightly higher to make me tilt my hips in towards him. The moan left my mouth as he picked up the momentum of his thrust and my hands clenched him tighter. My body responded to the new position with a building intensity and all I could do was hold on and let the pleasure take over.

Gasping for breath I made my need known, “I’m gonna…can’t…Ed...ward.”

“Let it go,” he grunted in my ear.

And I did.

Pushing my back against the wall my hips thrust forward as my body was rattled with tingly warmth. My hands held on to any part of Edward’s body they could find as I rode out the orgasm letting him use my body until his own release spilt inside me. The groan left him a split second before he attacked my mouth with his own. Our tongues moved together in a dance for dominance that was leaving me even more breathless. Edward pulled away from my mouth with heavy pants, resting his forehead against mine as we both got our breathing under control.

Tilting my head my lips once again found his and both my hands slipped behind his neck holding him to me until Edward forcefully pulled away from me. The motion causing him to grunt and me to whimper as I felt him still semi-firm slip from my body.

“If we don’t stop, we’re never going to make it out of here.”

“I’m all up for that.”

“Ok.”

Not sure that I heard him correctly I questioned with hopefulness, “Really?”

“Sure,” Edward said letting go of my thigh so I could put it down. “But you have to explain to my mother why we weren’t there.”

Thinking back to the seriousness of Esme’s eyes when she sent me out of the bathroom I decided that was one conversation I would rather not have. “Ah…we better hurry up.”

“Good choice,” Edward chuckled at my reply nodding as he dropped his pants the rest of the way off his body, giggling I removed my bathing suit bottoms. “That’s the first time I ever took my pants off after sex.”

“Sorry, I just couldn’t wait anymore,” Edward confessed picking up the bottle of body wash.

“I’m not complaining.”

The shower was so big with so many different spray nozzles that it was easy for both of us to shower at the same time. Turning off the faucets Edward reached over to grab some towels, handing me one I started to briskly rub it through my hair. When I was done he had his towel wrapped around his waist and was handing me another one for my body.

Going into the bedroom I groaned at all the packages, knowing where my discontent stemmed from, Edward chuckled, “How about a glass of wine?”

Telling him yes, I set about clearing off the bed putting the larger purchases over by the seating area and condensing some of the bags. Pulling out all the little boys’ clothes I put them in with all the crib sheets before dumping out the contents of the last bag. The bed was filled with frilly pink outfits. Picking up the hanger containing the pretty ruffled dress with a bodice full of smocking, my finger ran over the soft white lace embellishments.

Shoving it into the bag I couldn’t contain my resentment, “Fucking Alice.”

“Woo…” the sound made me look up, “What did my sister do now?”

“Nothing,” I said shoving the rest of the clothes into the bag as fast as I could.

Edward reached out grabbing the last little outfit, a dark pink sleeper with the words, “Daddy’s Angel” written under a little embossed sleeping cherub with brown curly hair. He stood there in a towel rubbing the soft fleecy terry cloth between his fingers for a few moments before looking at me.

“Does your discontent with my sister have anything to do with her comments about not dressing her niece in stuff you got off someone’s lawn?”

I could feel my eyes fill up with tears and I blinked them back, “She shouldn’t say those things”

“She doesn’t mean any harm.”

I knew that he was right, Alice wasn’t being malicious. In her mind she truly believed what she was saying, she also thought that by telling me she was helping. The problem was that sometimes she was so convincing that I started to believe her and that was just too painful to deal with.

Edward continued to eye me as he handed the outfit over, “Is that why you bought all the girls stuff?”

“No,” I smiled at him hoping to take the look of bewilderment off his face. “I’m not crazy enough to buy clothes for a possible baby that will never happen. I bought this stuff because I am absolutely convinced that Leah is having a girl, and if she doesn’t I’ll donate it all to the center.”

Taking the few steps towards me Edward stroked the length of my jaw with the back of his fingers, “You know Bella, it might be possible.”

I couldn’t deal with Edward believing in the impossible too, “Did you see my medical reports?”

The day I told him the worst of what James had done to me; Edward came in to find me hysterically crying. Amongst the pile of papers scattered around my living room the medical reports were with them. I didn’t know if he had looked at them or not. Edward had told me afterwards that he had gathered everything up for Leah to put away but he was unable to look at the pictures. I couldn’t say that I blamed him.

“No, but there are advancements and…”

It was not something I wanted to discuss at that moment, besides he was missing the most important part of the whole equation, “And are you saying you want to impregnate me?”

“Not right this minute nâhtötse…” glancing over at the clock Edward smiled mischievously. “…I’m not that quick. Besides for all my kinky ways I have some very old fashion idea’s and I think that babies should be born to two people who love, honor and obey”

Love, honor and obey?

That sounded like a marriage or a D/s relationship

Edward took the last bag from me placing it over by the seating area where I had put everything else and handed me a glass of wine which I took a drink of before going into the bathroom to dry my hair. While the heat from the dryer blew through my hair I wondered about the last thing that Edward had said. When I asked about impregnating me he didn’t say ‘absolutely not,’ instead he implied that we would be married first.

Was Edward thinking about marring me?

Looking into the mirror while I ran a brush through my hair I wondered if I even wanted to get married again. I wasn’t exactly sure that I believed in the institution or exactly what a piece a paper said or didn’t say about a relationship. For the most part it boils down to legitimizing children and since I was very sure that we would not be faced with that consequence there really was no reason to go through the whole process of a marriage.

Besides that the first time around had been a colossal mistake that nearly cost me my life along with my sanity. I was young and chose foolishly, thinking that once we were married everything would work out. In my mind I thought that once I was James’ wife he would automatically respect me but I should have known that the respect has to come first. That is something I always got from Edward along with tenderness and unconditional love.

Another thing with getting married was giving up my autonomy; I had just gotten back to being my own person. Although when I thought about it I didn’t truly know independence until I handed control of myself over to Edward. It seems like an oxymoron finding individualism in subjection but that is exactly what I did. I have never in my life been more happy or more fulfilled and there was one thing I knew for sure, there was no way in hell I could go back to the way I had been living my life.

Brushing the Mascara through my lashes all those thoughts ran through my mind. What exactly would change with a marriage? One thing came to the forefront of my thoughts and I knew without a doubt that yes I would like nothing more than to one day be: Isabella Marie Cullen.

We weren’t going anywhere fancy for dinner so I dressed casually in khaki capris and a brown sleeveless button-down that tied around the waist with my strappy sandals. I thought about wearing my bells but decided against them out of respect for Edward’s parents. When he gave them to me he said that there would be people who knew what they represented and I was sure that Esme and Carlisle were among them.

I made sure that I had my phone and room key in my purse before we left, walking down the hall holding hands Edward brought up my phone call with Jane asking what I meant by seeing her Thursday night.

“Your mom is excited about your aunt and uncle coming to town and she wanted us all to come over for dinner but I already told Leah we would eat with them,” glancing up to see his reaction, there didn’t seem to be any disapproval. “So I told your mom that we would come over afterwards for a little bit, is that ok?”

“Sure,” he said pushing the button to call the elevator. “That’s why Jane called you?”

“No, that was just part of the conversation,” I told him stepping inside. “I had called her…”

“You told me she phoned you?”

The accusation was clear. “She did…” Edward sighed at the contradiction, “I left her a message first and she was returning my call.”

I knew what he wanted and figured it was best to tell him, “I wanted to ask her opinion on the task you gave me.”

As I said the words the doors opened and we stepped out into the lobby to meet most of his family. Rose and Emmett still weren’t there and as we said hello to everyone Vinny came over to take my hand. “Come here Aunt Bella I want to show you something.”

Before he could drag me away Edward stopped him, “Hold on a second, let me talk Aunt Bella first.”

Amongst the eyes of his family Edward lead me over to the corner, “What do you mean her opinion?”

He sounded kind of mad which didn’t make any sense to me because I thought my talking to Jane was already pre-approved. Edward narrowed his eyes as his face took on a serious appearance. “Isabella it doesn’t matter what Jane or anyone else thinks about the task I give you. Their opinion holds
no power over me.”

I was slightly taken aback because I think Edward misunderstood what I was talking about, “I didn’t ask Jane what she thought about the task, I was looking for direction in fulfilling it.”

“Why didn’t you ask me?” he sounded almost hurt.

“Because you yelled at me”

I could see that my answer shocked him by the way his eyes widened as his head jerked back, “I didn’t yell at you. I did reminded you of your place when you made an insufferable sound and then afterwards I gave you the opportunity to ask me anything.”

“Well I couldn’t think of anything then. But while I was shopping I thought maybe Jane could help me to come up with some goals.”

The vagueness of my explanation led Edward to come to his own conclusion. “So basically you had Jane do your homework for you.”

“No,” shaking my head I tried to explain, “she just helped me narrow down my choices. You said the goals could be anything, that’s a broad spectrum with lots of choices…”

“Yo…you two ready?” Emmett had arrived and Vinny was back pulling on my hand. “Come on Aunt Bella.”

Unable to thwart the five year old boy I took Edward’s hand pulling him along as I finished my thoughts, “All she did was help me narrow down the choices”

Vinny lead us towards the large indoor pond in the corner of the lobby pointing at the large fish. “Look those are Koi fish. They come all the way from Japanese…” his bright blue eyes shown with excitement as he looked up at me, “that’s on the other side of the world.”

“You’re right it is, but the fish are Japanese because they come from Japan. Like we are Americans because we come from…”

“America!” He announced triumphantly.

“That’s right, you’re so smart,” tussling his hair before he ran smiling back to his mother. Looking up at Edward I wondered if tussling his hair would result in a smile. “Did I do something wrong because I thought it was alright to talk to Jane about anything?”

Reaching out Edward held my chin while searching my eyes for something, when he spoke there was a hint of sadness in his voice, “You have free reign in your conversations with Jane, have you documented it in your journal yet?”

“No, I was going to do it tonight.”

“See that you write out every detail because that is a conversation that I will be analyzing very closely,” Edward pulled my chin a little higher before he touched his lips to mine for a chaste kiss then he dropped his hand and gave me a piercing stare, “Understand?”

I understood what he wanted me to do I just couldn’t comprehend why that particular conversation would be of such interest to him. There wasn’t any time for me to get clarification as everyone started to leave. Then instead of riding in our own car Edward and I drove with his parents, Esme filled Edward in on the plan for Thursday night. She really was excited about her brother coming to town and I was getting excited to meet the oldest of the siblings.

Once that conversation was exhausted I asked Carlisle about the Center. We had been together for three days but there were always people around us and it wouldn’t have been proper to discuss any specifics. Since the only person in the car who wasn’t associated with the Center was Edward I felt like it was acceptable to ask. He assured me that all was well; Dana had left on Friday as planned, going back to her original job working at the bank.

That worried me a little because I knew that she still had more time left in the medical leave she had taken and it might have been a better course of action to use it. Dana was headstrong and determined to live her life to the fullest. I just hoped that enough time had passed for her husband to have given up looking for her.

Carlisle was talking about some of the things the girls had done and we were laughing at the attempted runny fudge when he said, “Carol has an assignment for you,” before he caught himself. Our eyes met in the rearview mirror for an instant before he looked away with a guilty expression.

“What does she want?” I didn’t understand Carlisle’s reaction I would do whatever I could but I had to admit that I was already giving as much time as I could.

Carlisle chuckled, “I’m going to let Carol tell you.”

Trying to finagle information out of Carlisle was like trying to take rum from an alcoholic, it wasn’t happening. I even resorted to bribery however he wasn’t swayed by my naming our next puppy after him. Glancing over at Esme I got the sense that she was aware of what he was talking about however looking at Edward he had no clue as he shrugged, “I guess you’ll find out on Monday.”

The restaurant was inside of the casino, which Emmett wanted to go to the next – our final – night. Alice wasn’t as up for that plan because she had the kids. As they were discussing what else we could do Esme came to the rescue saying that when they left the next day she would take the kids with them. That would give Alice and Jasper one night to go out and as Esme put it “shake their tail feathers.” All throughout dinner Edward seemed distracted. He still pulled out my chair, shared an appetizer and spoke at the appropriate places and maybe to anyone else he seemed fine, but I knew something was bothering him.

The only thing that I could think of was my conversation with Jane and I wished that we had a few minutes to be alone so we could talk about it. Once dinner was over Esme told everyone to not order dessert because she had a whole pie – that Carlisle had bought at the bake sale – back at the hotel. Alice wanted to put the kids to bed so that meant that we all ended up in her room. We sat around eating the mixed berry pie – which was really good- having drinks and played a few rounds of Uno. It was almost eleven when we left with the plan to meet down in the restaurant for breakfast at nine.

Emmett and Rose left with us and on the elevator Edward talked with his brother about some of the extra events planned for the weekend at the club. They seemed to have all kinds of games and activities planned to help with the Anniversary celebration. I still wasn’t looking forward to going back there but it did sound like a lot of attention was given to making the party memorable.

After saying good night Edward and I continued in silence down the hall to our room. Once inside he kicked off his shoes and went to the refrigerator, “Do you want a glass of wine to drink while working on your journal?”

I knew that the rule was all conversations with Jane had to be documented before the end of the day, so it didn’t surprise me but I really wanted to know what his problem was. I should have just asked instead I figured I would bid my time and answered his question, “Sure.”

Taking my journal out of my purse I went into the bedroom and started to underdress, opting for a sleep shirt. I was just pulling it over my head when Edward came in to hand me the wine. While I sat down on the bed to begin writing Edward changed into pajama pants then told me that he was going to sit out on the balcony until I was done. He was giving me alone time to get my thoughts together yet I couldn’t help but to feel like I was being punished for something.

It’s not like I can’t be alone or that I am afraid to be alone, really it was the way I have lived my whole life. It was more of the way he left the room, in a very uncharacteristic way of not saying a word or even a kiss on the cheek. Leaving me to feel deserted and all those abandonment issues came back. It was a wretched feeling that once I had relayed the conversation with Jane, came out in my writing.

An hour later I had exhausted everything inside of me, setting the journal on the nightstand I went into the bathroom to wash my face. Six hours earlier I was standing looking in the same mirror contemplating the possibility of becoming a Cullen. Looking into my own eyes, reality set in and just like the dream of pink frilly dresses I had to stop deluding myself.

The problem was I didn’t want to stop believing in the impossible because even if it was only a dream it was still better than nothing at all. With that thought in mind I went back into the bedroom picked up my empty glass and went out on the balcony to talk to Edward.